Inept romantic sentiments

The Washington Post asked readers to come up with inept romantic sentiments

for Valentine’s Day:

Your kisses are sweeter than wine, but without the paper bag.

I am irrationally exuberant for you in the third quarter of my fiscal life, with rising

indicators.

My love for you runs hotter than a ’74 Nova with a V-8 engine and a busted water

pump.

Darling, you make me as hot as those hand dryers in a turnpike restroom.

If we were cockroaches, I’d want to have all 456,845 of your children.

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