4th of July Jokes

4th of July Jokes

Funny Jokes4th of July Jokes

How is a healthy person like the United States?
They both have good constitutions!

What quacks, has webbed feet, and betrays his country?
Beneduck Arnold!

What’s big, cracked, and carries your luggage?
The Liberty Bellhop!

What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?
Liberty!

What was General Washington’s favorite tree?
The infantry!

What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1773?
The Boston Flea Party!

4th of July Quotes

What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?
The Americans licked the British!

What ghost haunted King George III?
The spirit of ’76!

Did you hear about the cartoonist in the Continental Army?
He was a Yankee doodler!

Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?
Because the horse was too heavy to carry!

What would you get if you crossed a patriot with a small curly-haired dog?
Yankee Poodle!

4th of July Quotes

Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?
Yeah, it cracked me up!

What did one flag say to the other flag?
Nothing. It just waved!

What dance was very popular in 1776?
Indepen-dance!

What march would you play at a jungle parade?
“Tarzan Stripes Forever”!

Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?
Because they’re both cracked!

What was the craziest battle of the Revolutionary War?
The Battle of Bonkers Hill.

Fourth of July Recipes

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Fourth of July Quotes

Fourth of July Quotes

I’m a Yankee Doodle Dandy, A Yankee Doodle do or die,
A real live nephew of my Uncle Sam, Born on the Fourth of July!
I’ve got a Yankee Doodle sweetheart, She’s my Yankee Doodle joy.
Yankee Doodle came to London, Just to ride the ponies.
I AM THAT YANKEE DOODLE BOY!
– George M. Cohan – from Yankee Doodle Dandy (1942)

You’re a grand old flag,
You’re a high flying flag
And forever in peace may you wave.
You’re the emblem of, the land I love,
The home of the free and the brave.
Ev’ry heart beats true ‘neath the Red, White and Blue,
Where there’s never a boast or brag.
But should auld acquaintance be forgot,
Keep you eye on the grand old flag.
– George M. Cohan, You’re A Grand Old Flag

God bless America, land that I love,
Stand beside her, and guide her,
Through the night, with the light from above,
From the mountains, to the prairies
To the oceans, white with foam
God bless America, my home sweet home,
God bless America! My Home Sweet Home!
– Irving Berlin, God Bless America

Lots More Quotes

Fourth of July Quotes

Fourth of July Quotes

Fourth of July Quotes

Fourth of July Quotes