Chemistry Joke – A Visual Organic Chemistry Joke

Chemistry Jokes

Chemistry Jokes

Ortho – docs Para – Docs Meta docs ?  no – Meta Physicians.

Orthodox Paradox Metaphysicians

Explanation:  We learn in Organic Chemistry while studying the chemistry of Benzene that the adjacent position on the six carbon ring is called the Ortho position, the position separated by one carbon atom is the Meta position and the position separated by two carbon atoms is called the Para position.

The proper name for the first compound shown above would more properly be something like Ortho di-DOCyl Benzene but when shown to a sophomore Chemistry student, is easily recognized as Ortho – DOCS (hence Orthodox.)  The second structure Para di-DOCyl Benzene is Para – DOCS (hence Paradox.)  Most students guess at the third structure being Meta DOCS (hence Meta physicians.)

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Funny Jokes

A three year old put his shoes on by himself. His mother noticed the left
was on the right foot. She said, “Son, your shoes are on the wrong feet.”
He looked up at her with a raised brow and said, “Don’t kid me, Mom, I
KNOW they’re my feet.”

Funny Jokes

You heard about the lady with five children whose doctor prescribed
her Valium for anxiety and stress, right? When she went back in two
weeks she told the doctor that everything was wonderful! She said
that her house was quiet and clean, she had time to read and even
enjoy her favorite television shows each day.

But she did need a refill on her script. “A refill, already?!”, said the
doctor, “How many pills are you taking?”

“Taking!?” the patient replied, “I’ve been giving them to my children.”

Joke of the Day

Mr. Greenberg was an illiterate immigrant, but he worked hard, saved his
pennies, and started a small business. It did well, and soon he had
enough money to send for the wife and children. The work kept him very
busy, so he never had time to learn to write, but the bank was happy to
do business with him, even though his signature consisted of two X’s.
He prospered, he opened more stores, the kids were transferred to private
schools, the family moved into a fancy house (with one staircase going
nowhere just for show)…you get the idea. One day his banker, Mr. Smith,
asked him to drop by. “So vat’s the problem?” Greenberg asked, a bit
anxiously. Smith waved a bunch of checks at him. “Perhaps nothing,” he
said, “but I wanted to be on the safe side. These recent checks of yours
are all signed with 3 X’s, but your signature of record has just 2.”
Greenberg looked embarrassed. “I’m sorry about making trouble,” he said,
“but my vife said that since I’m now such a high class rich guy, I should
have a middle name!”

Funny Joke

Long ago there was a kingdom where the King wore a brightly
colored vest instead of a crown. The vest was adorned with all
different colors of berries to make it beautiful.

Maintaining this vest was difficult because it needed freshening
daily. In order to do this, his people would go into the mountains
with big nets. They would throw the nets over the berry bushes,
and snare the fresh berries for the King.

The people valued and honored this vest as the symbol of the
throne. And so it was a tragedy when one day the colors on the
King’s vest were fading badly. The people were asked to bring in
fresh berries, but there were none to be had.

The King looked very bad, so much so that he so he issued this
proclamation … “A reward will be paid for those who snare enough
to mend the berry vest.”

Cat Jokes – Theories Of Cat Behavior

Clean Jokes

Cat behavior – Theories Of Cat Behavior

LAW OF CAT INERTIA A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.

LAW OF CAT MOTION A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.

FIRST LAW OF CAT ENERGY CONSERVATION Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.

LAW OF BAG/BOX OCCUPANCY All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond.

LAW OF FURNITURE REPLACEMENT A cat’s desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.

LAW OF CAT COMPOSITION A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-matter + It Doesn’t Matter.

LAW OF CAT OBEDIENCE As yet undiscovered.

Cat Quotes

Hospital Humor – Funny Jokes

Funny Jokes

It’ll Be Okay

A man was wheeling himself frantically down the hall of the hospital in his wheelchair, just before his operation. The head nurse stopped him and asked, “What’s the matter?”

He said, “I heard the nurse say, ‘It’s a very simple operation, don’t worry, I’m sure it will be all right.'”

The head nurse said, “She was just trying to comfort you.  What’s so frightening about that?”

The patient said, “She wasn’t talking to me. She was talking to my surgeon!”